. : emily hong : .

Week 6 = Worst Week Ever.

My stress started to manifest itself physically. NOT GOOD.

Generally speaking, I’m pretty good about taking care of myself and making sure that I stay healthy, but for some reason, this whole quarter I’ve been plagued with sickness.  That’s not good because I was determined to work on having a healthier lifestyle this quarter.

My first goal of the quarter was to kick out a cold, which I did; but I got sick again, which kind of defeats the purpose of being healthy.  Speaking of which, looking at those goals, I feel like I’ve made some headway.

I have become a more efficient student in that my time management skills have dramatically improved.  I have taken the steps that I think are necessary to raise my GPA.  With the exception of sickness, I’ve been running 4 days a week (with a week total of about 12-15 miles).

I’ve also taken steps to improve my work environment for next year, we’ve put into motion several things that will really come to fruition; I’m very excited to see a few of these projects come to life!

The simplest ones are the goals that involve writing, which I thought may have been the more difficult ones simply because everything is typed nowadays.  I’ve taken to writing a few on my mirror every week, just so that I’m forced to see it everyday.  I’ve even written the word “MEDIATOR” and the phrase “Be faithful in the little things” on the mirror, so I feel motivated.

The most challenging parts are definitely the road bumps.  I find my other obligations getting in the way; emergencies that pop up; sickness that overtakes my life.  I have been doing really well otherwise; or, at least, that’s how I feel like I’m doing. :)

Perhaps I just have to get a very, very concise and precise schedule down, but that might be more difficult as the quarter continues to progress.  To improve my effectiveness, I would also need to really bring in some more focus on my health.  It would do my life no good if I got sick once again in the next few weeks.  I have to be a little bit more selfish with my time and use it to focus on the things that I need to focus on; instead of letting my friends have my time because they know that I can’t say ‘no’ if they need a friend.

Some goals are a little more long term, though. I mean, I just learned how to ride a bike for the first time in my life a few days ago! It was quite exciting…and painful.  I’m a little sore, but I think I like biking, I just need to practice a little bit more.  That means that I’m on my way to being socially acceptable! YAY!

In other news, I have been doing tons of research about graduate school and what I’m going to do after Cal Poly.  I’ve figured out a few things, but some have become more foggy; and strangely enough, I’m okay with it.  I have a list of about 10 graduate programs that I’m interested in, but I want to narrow it down to, at most, 6 programs so that I’ll be focused. 

I feel very stretched out right now, and I want my goals to be more concise.  It would relieve me of a lot of stress.  If, in the next year, I can decide my top graduate schools, I can really focus on getting my grades up to par and work on more short term goals to work up to the long term goal.

For instance, I can begin to visit these schools or really narrow down my intended area of study.  I can start the grad school search again, which will bring some new adventures to my life.  Part of me really doesn’t want to do anything because I’m so overwhelmed.  I kind of want more time in my life.  It’s the one thing that I always have too much of when I’m bored, but too little of when I’m busy. 

Why is that?

I’m looking forward to becoming a specialist in Conflict Resolution and Mediation.

It’s just a matter of time.

Back to Basics.

I’m Emily Hong.

Interestingly enough, I am originally a Nashvhille native…so I got my southern belle hat to toot every now and then…but at the root of me, I am probably a SoCal girl through and through.  Even though San Luis Obispo is currently where I live, I call the city of Los Angeles my home.

I grew up in a family where perfection was the standard and tradition was held to a higher degree.  When I say family, though, I’m not just referring to my mom and dad; I’m referring to my grandfather, my grandmother, my aunts, my uncles, my cousins - all of my extended family.

This is where my strong family values and respect for tradition come from, but this is also where I found myself learning to become.  I found that I did not want to follow the traditional roles of a woman according to my family.  I wanted more.

It wasn’t easy to break away from the family tradition, but as I grew older and learned more about the world and about myself, it was easier.

Tradition stated that, as a woman, I was to become a wife to take care of my husband as soon as I am able to;  I asserted, however, that I wanted to have an education.  This is, by no means, me saying that I am turning away or breaking from my past; this is me saying that I am expanding my identity and exploring the options to my future.

And now, I’m a first generation college student in my family.  Currently, I’m a third year Political Science and Biological Sciences double major at California Polytechnic State University with an intended minor in Sustainable Environments.  With this education, I hope to be well on my way to being a mediator.

What’s a mediator, you ask?

Well, I can answer that.  A mediator is the negotiator between two parties, who are in dispute.  The goal is to seek an early resolution through a conference where the mediator is an active participant in the discussions and attempts to work out a solution.

In fewer words, I like the art of compromise, collaboration, and community; and thus, I would like to put my passion for people into an action.

I think I’d be good at mediation because I’m pretty good at balancing and staying level-headed.  I’m a person who can look out for the protection of both parties and look for the compromise in the dispute.

Forward Thinking.

I do have aspirations.  I hope to go to law school, just to understand the legal process, since mediation and conciliation is an alternative to a lawsuit.  Having a law degree will help me in the quest to landing a job at a law firm as a mediator; after that, I hope that I’ll be able to open up my own mediation firm.

Everything does come at a price, though.  Right now, the biggest challenge is figuring out my post-graduate plans.  There are, of course, other factors: finances, self-care, other ambitions, family obligations, and so on.  Most of these, I take on as they come up, but as time continues (as it should), I’ve started to put dates and a finite deadline so that I know that I cannot simply allow things to pass.

Some things, simply put, i have just got to do it.

The Moments Now.

I’m figuring out that I love to understand and see all perspectives of any issue.  I can separate my personal feelings from what is best from others because the two do not necessarily intersect. 

I tend to disregard my own well-being if others are involved because I put others above me; this has given me reason to schedule time for self-care.  During those times, I like to listen to music, write fiction, or create artwork.  I may or may not share these spurs of creativity from time to time.  I also like to stay active by playing sports and running.

All in all, my life has shaped me to understand that I cannot be content with simply being a person in the world.  I have to become something; I have to become someone.  In essence, I have to become - come into my being in this world.

And for that, I leave with a simple statement that I live my life by:

I am not simply striving to be, but learning to become.